As you might already know, Robbin Thicke seperated with his wife of almost twenty years now Paula Patton and has been desperately trying to win her back ever since. With that in mind plus a whole list of other things, I was recently inspired to do a small survey amongst my friends to see what they think about keeping in touch with exes, especially when in a new relationship.
And I found that most guys are incensed by the idea, where most girls do not see anything wrong with it especially if the girl has totally moved on.
One might ask however, why would an ex want to keep in contact with you? And have you noticed that its mostly the ones who broke your heart that always want to come back and “be friends”? The million dollar question I suppose would be, ‘so what is wrong with that?’
And that is what I found most of the girls on my contact list reckon. The logic is that if I have moved on then what is wrong with giving my ex my number? What is wrong with an ocassional chat on app, on Facebook, over the phone and even catching up over coffee here and there?
I suppose that if you are single, it probably sounds OK. After all, it’s someone you have history with and being hard on him may come off as you being immature yes? But then that’s when it is most dangerous because you will start to have those feelings resurfacing again.
Now, if feelings for him can resurface when you are single, what prevents them from resurfacing when you are with someone else? A friend of mine said, “an ex is like a bad habit”. And I must say, he has a point there.
One of the girls I asked about this said, “there is nothing wrong with talking with your ex. And the guy who minds, he is just insecure”. Another guy I asked said, “if I found out that my girl is talking with her ex, I would be so enraged, I would dump her because why is she entertaining him? Am I not enough for her?”
Where some girls did see it the guys’ way and figured its a bad idea to entertain an ex, some guys too said they didn’t mind. For the girls who do not seem to get it, I think that they do not put their boyfriends in their shoes. Assume your boyfriend was the one talking with his ex, would YOU be happy with that?
I know I would be more hurt than enraged and that’s how it is I should think for the guys. Although, we sometimes think that if it’s us girls, we can handle it, but if its the guys, they can’t so they must not speak to their exes at all.
What is your take on this? Is it okay to entertain an ex whether you are single or not? If yes? Do they ever have intentions or they just want to be friends? How would you feel if you found that your better half was entertaining their exe(s)?