Hey you. Do you like touching yourself? I mean … juicing your lady parts? Mahn, I have failed to do myself, literally. I just failed. I have tried with my fingers (mainly the middle one, because it’s longer), vegetables, bottles but … wapi! I just like a man’s ‘wood’ better than anything. Yeah. I like it hard ready to shoot. Have you ever seen ‘ekikompola’ (missile) ready to be launched. Ahaaa … that’s how I like it.
I know for men it’s a bit easy or should I say … more like eating cake. (… and don’t allow any man lie to you that they have never done this, I heard all men have done it at one point in their life), and I usually ask my boyfriends to show me how they ‘choke the chicken’ so that I give them brilliant hand jobs. You should see how they handle that wood with maximum care! Ayi! Experience of the highest order.
But see, when you have to insert your fingers in a hole and move left right centre to locate the damn g-spot and you have to alternate the movements, it gets hard. (Okay for me and one friend I intimated my troubles only to find she was in the same boat.) So I decided to do what I do best … google, ask around, and find out the various ways a woman can masturbate and enjoy the work of her hands.
I know earlier I mentioned that I like my wood, but, there’s a reason I went another mile to learn about the following techniques. There are chances that the best orgasms will come from you. Yes. Most women do not orgasm from penetration. They orgasm by clitoral stimulation. While there are plenty of men who are good enough to know how to stimulate a woman’s clitoris properly (either orally or manually), much of the time they don’t. So we are going to spice up our sex lives, ourselves! ‘Dot com generation things’.
I got plenty of advice, I’m going to share with you then we go experiment, okay? Cool. Here we go;
But first, remember; you need to be okay with masturbation, so examine your feelings. If you are shy around people while touching yourself, make sure you are a lone before you do. Get something to motivate you … an erotic magazine, movie, music, visualise yourself with that guy you like or are crushing on … anything that will get you in the mood. Don’t put yourself on pressure; you can always do a ‘re-take’. Learn the basics and keep practising.
So, there’s grinding
You can use a pillow, a hard but smooth surface … just grind your vuvla against something. You can do it slow or fast … whichever way you like it. You can also use a ‘massager’ to intensify the sensation. Right mindset, comfortable environment, grinding can do magic.
Rub your clit
You can use 2 or 4 fingers or the palm of your hand to rub the clitoris, often in a circular motion until your little boat is standing in attention. (You know it actually looks like a little boat when it’s super excited.) You have to be sure that your clit likes to be stimulated though. If it gets too sensitive, you will not like the pleasure, it turns into pain. If you prefer using a shower head to run water over your clit, go girl. That also works.
I know I said I’m not good with this, but hey, it might do wonders for you! Pay attention to your ‘flower’ and understand where your g-spot is; so that when you’re fingering yourself, you know the right spot to touch. Remember to wet your fingers before you start.
If you are of age, you have heard or seen dildos and vibrators. Those babies will send you to cloud 9.
Don’t ignore an electric toothbrush my friend. That thing can give you some good sensations as well.
Then there’s a play station. Keep calm. (I see you frowning). All you really need is a game that makes the controller vibrate. If the game gets a little boring you can always spruce it with a self-induced orgasm. You’re sure to win! Configure the best way for the controller to stimulate your clitoris. Once the game starts, the challenge is getting the controller to vibrate. This is the element that makes the orgasm more intense – you don’t have 100% control. Therefore, the excitement builds as it vibrates at the right time while knowing it could stop. Game on!
By the way, if you are one of those people who don’t believe in masturbation, FYI;
It makes you happier, you become more comfortable with your body, can improve your sex life because knowing your body in this way can make you more confident in bed and more vocal with partners.
It helps you sleep; it’s a great way to release sexual tension. If you’ve chosen to not have sex or are simply going through a dry spell, masturbating is a great way to satisfy your libido.
It relieves stress, masturbating increases blood flow throughout your body and releases feel-good brain chemicals called endorphins but most importantly you get multiple. orgasms. Understanding how your body works helps you know exactly how to pleasure it. Once, twice, three times — it’s up to you! For most men, climax is often times only at the end of sex, but women can keep going. Why stop at one?
Now, off you go. ‘A girl must touch herself tonight’.